Kidney Stones and other horror

My husband has been struck down with kidney stones.

Most of the time, he's either in excruciating pain, or he's a Vicodin Zombie. Occasionally, he'll have moments of relief. But then the pain will come back, and he'll curl into a ball on the couch and stay there. Apparently he has a 6mm stone in his left ureter that doesn't seem to want to come out on its own. We're starting the 4th week of Kidney Stone misery. I am ready for this to be over. When he was initially diagnosed, the paperwork the doctor gave us said most stones pass within 48 hours. Doctors lie. At his last appointment, they said they'd schedule him for a procedure where they blast the stone apart with sound waves (it's call lithotripsy, which is a really fun word to say!), but so far he has no procedure date. See? Doctors lie.

In addition to that, my mother-in-law (who lives in another State) is suffering from acute cystocele. That's a prolapsed bladder. Or, in other words, her bladder is falling out of her body. Via her girly bits. If that doesn't horrify you into doing your kegels, ladies, I don't know what will. Allow me to add that the phrase, "a balloon from my vagina" is not something you EVER want to hear from your mother-in-law. EVER. She is understandably very uncomfortable, and pretty much unable to work or do much of anything. So, much like her son, she has to stay curled up on the couch all day. She's bored out of her mind, and so she calls us every day and wants to have long phone conversations as a way to pass the time. But she doesn't really have anything to talk about other than her medical condition. Did I mention she also has a rectal prolapse? I'll spare you the details. Suffice it to say: the phrase "TMI" is not something with which she is familiar.

2011 is off to an interesting start.